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Author: JakeConlan

Annapolis government news religion 

Mayor Buckley Announces Jedi Religion

JakeConlan

Mayor Buckley Announces Jedi Religion Believes that mind tricks could balance city budget Annapolis (SPP) – On a typical Sunday morning, many Annapolitans may find themselves in a church pew, but Annapolis Mayor Gavin Buckley won’t be one of them. Buckley announced this morning that he has embraced the Jedi faith, the fictional faith of the Star Wars universe. Buckley, who never publicly spoke of his religious beliefs or background before today, told this reporter at a bar in Annapolis, where both had been drinking, that he had been a…

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Annapolis crime government international news religion 

Pantelides Gets 60 Years for Terror Plot

JakeConlan

Pantelides Gets 60 Years for Terror Plot Former Mayor planned to blow up Cypriot gas rig   Nicosia (SPP) – Former Annapolis Mayor Mike Pantelides won’t be back on the streets of Annapolis, or anywhere else, for some time to come, thanks to a Cypriot judge handing him 60 years, the maximum, for planning a terror attack. Pantelides’s problems started late last year when a commercial DNA test revealed that he was Turkish and had no Greek ancestry. This came as a shock to Pantelides, who always took pride in…

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Annapolis Anne Arundel crime government national news 

Taney Statue Replaced by Hogan and Franchot

JakeConlan

Taney Statue Replaced by Hogan and Franchot Pair came up with the idea while drinking Maryland beer Annapolis (SPP) – St. Patrick’s Day came a little late for Maryland Governor Larry Hogan and Comptroller Peter Franchot this year. After a day of hard drinking yesterday, the duo came up with a replacement for the statute of Chief Justice Roger B. Taney, which was controversially removed by Hogan last August. Taney was the first Marylander to serve as Chief Justice of the US Supreme Court, but he was infamous for authoring…

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Annapolis government news 

Annapolis Passes Anti-NRA Law

JakeConlan

Annapolis Passes Anti-NRA Law Website to be blocked among other measures Annapolis (SPP) – At last night’s Annapolis City Council meeting, decisive action was taken to shut down the NRA in the city. Dubbed the Anti-NRA law, the “Restore Freedom and Peace Act” co-sponsored by Alderman Marc Rodriguez (D) and Mayor Gavin Buckley (D) passed with near unanimity. The controversial bill, which many legal experts say will face stiff legal challenges, bans the NRA from holding events and soliciting within the city, fines NRA members who are city residents $1000…

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Annapolis crime international news 

Pantelides Arrested in Cyprus Terror Raid

JakeConlan

Pantelides Arrested in Cyprus Terror Raid Planned suicide attack on Greek gas rig – police Nicosia (SPP) – Former Annapolis Mayor Mike Pantelides continued his downward spiral today after he was arrested by Cypriot authorities. Police on the Greek side of the island say that Pantelides was planning a suicide attack on a gas rig making its way to the Aphrodite gas field off the coast of the divided island. Pantelides, who recently found out he was Turkish, not Greek, in a home DNA test, fled to the Turkish side…

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Annapolis crime news 

Another Murder Linked to Eastport Neighborhood Forum

JakeConlan

Another Murder Linked to Eastport Neighborhood Forum Police recommend avoiding group altogether   Annapolis (SPP) – Yet again yesterday, Annapolis City Police responded to the scene of a brutal murder that they believe was linked to a discussion on the Eastport Neighborhood Forum on Facebook. Lynda C. Christensen, 43, was found bludgeoned to death by her Yellow Pages phone book in her home on 6th Street. Police were called to the scene by her housekeeper, Rachel Simons, after she was unable to gain entry by knocking or calling Ms. Christensen…

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Annapolis government news religion 

Buckley Briefly Thought He Was Messiah – Report

JakeConlan

Buckley Briefly Thought He Was Messiah – Report Campaign photographer convinced him to try to walk on water   Annapolis (SPP) – Gavin Buckley was convinced by his campaign photographer, albeit briefly,  last summer during his mayoral campaign, that he was the Messiah. The astonishing report came from a former high ranking Buckley campaign advisor who requested anonymity. “Gavin was out having coffee one afternoon with his campaign photographer, this guy named Conrad, at 49 West. Conrad is sort of a local street philosopher type guy who lives in a…

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Annapolis environment government news 

Salt Water Crocodiles in Spa Creek

JakeConlan

Salt Water Crocodiles in Spa Creek Mayor Buckley Pushing Plan   Annapolis (SPP) – Annapolis Mayor Gavin Buckley’s plan to make Spa Creek “pristine” and swimmable during his first term took its first concrete steps yesterday as he announced he had reintroduced crocodiles to the area. During pre-historic times, the Chesapeake Bay was full of giant crocodiles. Even as late as a hundred years ago, it wasn’t unusual to spot alligators, who belong to the crocodilian family, in the bay and they sometimes still make their way as far north as the…

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Annapolis crime government international news 

Pantelides Indicted, Flees to Turkish Cyprus

JakeConlan

Pantelides Indicted, Flees to Turkish Cyprus Drafted into Turkish Cypriot Military North Nicosia (SPP) – Former Annapolis Mayor Mike Pantelides was indicted by a Federal Grand Jury in Baltimore on Friday for a violation of the Stolen Valor Act of 2013. This carries a penalty of up to one year in prison. Pantelides’s problems with the law started when a good Samaritan spotted the disgraced former mayor panhandling while pretending that he was a veteran. Pantelides never served in the armed forces. Pretending to be a veteran to receive anything…

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Annapolis government news 

Annapolis City Council Meeting Ends After Nearly 24 Hours

JakeConlan

Annapolis City Council Meeting Ends After Nearly 24 Hours Every Malcontent in City Showed up to Speak     Annapolis (SPP) – Last night’s Annapolis City Council meeting finally ended today at about 5:40 pm, almost 24 hours after it began. The third longest council meeting within the last year was dominated by talk of the historic Market House. There was also discussion about zoning concerns, historical preservation, and a variety of citizen complaints. Initially only scheduled for a couple hours, the meeting took on a life of its own…

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